How to speak each of the 5 love languages through gifts

What’s the last thing someone did for you that made you feel really loved?

Was it a gift? A picnic? Help doing something difficult? Whatever it was, the reason you felt so good was because that person figured out your love language. And if someone tried to do something nice for you and it fell flat- chances are they got your love language wrong. The 5 Love Languages are categories of ways in which we show and receive love. Marriage counsellor and linguist Gary Chapman, Ph.D., developed them thanks to his experiences working with couples.

Knowing someone’s love languages means you can show them you care in a way that’s sure to hit the spot for them – like cooking someone their favourite meal instead of your favourite meal. Of course, this knowledge is also extremely useful when it comes to buying gifts.

Read on to learn about the 5 languages and what type of gifts are most appreciated by each!

What are the 5 Love Languages and what are the best gifts for each?


Words Of Affirmation

People whose main love language is ‘Words of Affirmation’ love verbal acknowledgement and affection. Think spoken (or written) compliments and appreciation, texting, and frequent ‘I love you’s.

The best gifts are…

Anything with a heartfelt message- a letter, card, poem, or affirmations. People who feel the power of words will also probably treasure engraved jewellery.


Quality Time

Quality Time people are more about the bonding experience than any physical gift itself. It’s all about getting your undivided attention- so whatever you end up doing, make sure you put your phone away and focus on them!

The best gifts are…

Anything you can do together! A trip, a hike, a show, arts and crafts, even just building a tent in your lounge room and having a special picnic together. 



This one sounds obvious but is deceptively tricky to get right. Someone whose love language is ‘Gifts’ isn’t necessarily materialistic. It can be about having a physical reminder of your love for them, the pleasure of knowing you saw something and thought of them, or the warm feeling when you know enough about their hobbies to get them something related.

The best gifts are…

Things which are both beautiful and meaningful. The key here is to pay attention to what they’ve mentioned they’re into and get that. They’ll be touched you noticed and remembered! Think a new book, album, or videogame they’ve mentioned, dinner at a restaurant they love, or supplies for a hobby they have.


Acts of Service

Actions speak louder than words and sometimes it’s not about what you do, it’s the fact you’re doing it for them. Taking the time out of your day to do something helpful is what’ll make you a star in their eyes.

The best gifts are…

Take a task they’ve been dreading off their hands- clean the house, take their car to be serviced, or paint that feature wall they’ve been talking about. Taking the time to research and plan an experience is also a sure win- a trip, a staycation, breakfast in bed, or a home spa day where you take care of the pampering!


Physical Touch

The name pretty much says it! (Consensual) hugs, kisses, holding hands and other signs of physical affection make these people feel extra special. The best gifts (aside from cuddles) for these tactile folk are ones that’ll ground them in their body and create pleasurable sensations.

The best gifts are…

A massage is an obvious choice, but candles, lotions, massage oils, and bath bombs or shower steamers are also great options. A weighted blanket or a plush bathrobe and slippers will also feel like a hug when you’re not around to give them one!

Which love languages do you relate to the most? Do you know which ones your loved ones have? If you’re not sure, send this blog post to them and ask!

Now you’ve learned about the love languages, find out about how to use the Big 5 Personality Traits to choose crazy good gifts!

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